Updated: Apr 5, 2019
Baby it’s cold out --- today is - 32 C (-25.6 F) and feels like -49 C (-56.2 F
My grandson and I have a contract - He'll shovel my front and back deck whenever it snows, and I'll pay him every week whether it snows or not, so some weeks it snows lots and he works hard, and some weeks it doesn't snow at all so he doesn't work at all. It’s an amazing deal for both of us. I get my snow shoveled, and he gets a steady income.
Today, there is an extreme cold weather warning and the schools are closed so, I was surprised to look out the window to find him all bundled up and shoveling the deck.
Instead of coming up with excuses why he couldn’t keep his commitment, he came up with solutions to make it work and he got the job done. I am super proud of him.
Excuses are a cop-out, it’s a way to shirk or avoid your responsibilities or promises made. Sometimes there are legit reasons why you can’t keep a promise, but if we’re super honest with ourselves, most of the time we’re just blowing smoke, coming up with excuses to get out of doing something we really don’t want to do anyway.
The thing is, copping-out becomes a terrible habit, and not only that, but the more you use cop-out language such as; I can’t, it’s too hard, I don’t have what it takes, I’m too tired, I’m too stressed, I’m out of shape, I’m scared, I’m not smart enough, etc. the more you believe it, and the more copping-out is normalized, to the point that you’re not keeping promises to yourself, and not keeping commitments to others. Instead of living your best life, you’re living a life of limiting beliefs about who you are and what you’re capable of. You expend a whole lot of energy and time coming up with “reasons” why something won’t work, or why you can’t do what you committed to. What if you were more solution minded? What if you found ways to make it work instead?
REPLACE; "I can’t” with “I can do whatever I put my mind to” “It’s too hard” with “I’ll figure it out” “I’m too tired” with “I’ll adjust my bedtimes so I’m not too tired” “I’m scared” with “I’m making myself anxious, but I know from experience, everything gets easier over time, and I’m excited to be able to do this” “I’m not smart enough” with “I’m as smart as anyone, and if it takes me longer to learn, so what” “I’m out of shape” with “I will get in shape with repeated workouts”
When you change the messages you tell yourself, and become solution minded, you will stop copping-out on yourself and others and you’ll start feeling more confident, and better able to handle the hard things.
NOTE -- I'm not suggesting anyone should be reckless in extreme weather. My grandson was bundled up and toasty while he shoveled the deck.